10) Will be willing to take them for rides in the school van.
9) Will host after meeting “keggers” for the whole clan.
8) Won’t worry about sound educational policy.
7) Will use school funds to buy a special paper shredder to take care of pesky and embarrassing kickback receipts.
6) Will make a good drinking buddy at the Capital Conference.
5) Knows who to trust – Ay Carumba!
4) Will recognize the power and supreme authority of Dippity Doo Depot.
3) Has mental telepathy, so he can receive silent instructions during bored meetings.
2) Has a flexible code of ethics – whatever Ay Carumba! says, goes!
And the number one quality Ay Carumba! will be looking for in a new superintendent is….
1) Will serve as designated driver on riverboat drinking trips.
Originally Published March 12, 2007