School Bored Divided Over Funds

Originally Published December 10, 2001

As usual, the school bored can’t seem to come to a consensus on fund allocation. On one side of the issue, is Van Yearly and Dodger Dropem, who advocate spending funds on finding ways to block the roads from Federal Hocking to the Columbus International Airport. On the other side is Chuck Hopper and Johnny Elder, who think that more money needs to be spent on the students. Notorious peacemaker and fence-sitter Todd McGyver claims that he can fix the budget with just two coat hangers, some duct tape and a wad of gum.

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